Did you make any New Year’s resolutions?
Come on…be honest!
Seems that the favorites are weight and smoking related, with a few “will be nicer to all” thrown in and that the majority of said resolutions are not kept beyond the first month or so.
Gym memberships go up; nicotine gums sell out and folks line up at various coaching and counseling services – but all too soon something else gets in the way and the resolution gets sidelined to reappear next New Year’s Eve.
Let’s be clear – I’m not judging – we all have that baggage – or most of us anyway if we are open with ourselves. The question is why?
Why do we fall down? Why do we let lapse the goal that seemed so important to our lives as we counted down the seconds to a New Year? Why do we fail to achieve that which we so resolutely swore?
There is no end to the strategies to help keep resolutions…make only one; breaking a habit is deemed easier than starting a new one (maybe); enlist with a friend and on and on.
I’m going to take another view – one that is championed by my wife – and passionately I might add.
The problem with resolutions is that we make them during fits of motivated moments – with little thought of life integration. In other words we get caught up in the moment; really and truly we mean it…but as time passes – and we get further and further from the moment of resolution – we get less and less resolute.
So it goes.
My wife’s belief is that rather than make resolutions – grand sounding; bombastic; self congratulatory proclamations of wish states – we need to drive a stake into the ground and work hard every day – day by day – toiling at it; working it – understanding that it’s tough and that we need constant motivation and reinforcement – that there is no clear start and no real finish – and yes we will fail occasionally – but that we need to just get right back up and go for it again.
The difference is between waiting for Christmas to be nice; or Valentine’s Day to love; or Mother’s Day to respect Mom – versus working hard to be nice or love or respect every single day; every single hour.
So when I asked her last night what her resolutions were – she whacked me and asked why I hadn’t paid attention these past 30+ years – “Don’t tell me what you are going to do – just do it” she said. “Do it big or stay in bed…isn’t that your quote?” and so it goes.
So in Debbie’s name I share this thought for the New Year and if you have made resolutions I hope you keep them if you want to and if you haven’t I hope that you make every day a special and important one.
Listen:
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
Winston Churchill
May we all have the courage to continue and the strength to help one another and one final thought:
“It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.”
Edmund Hillary
All my best to all for ‘012!
Now…
What do you think??
I agree completely with your wife. I’ve tried for years making resolutions to lose weight, go to the gym and stay fit only to fall off the wagon a few months later because the motivation was only a short-term burst of commitment. But, when I decided I needed a life change that I had to work at ….not timed with a resolution or time of year…I was successful. I’ve lost 125 pounds so far and have more to go but am committed and dedicated to my cause. But, I feel like I changed my life not set a goal. I think a resolve to be better or do better is never an occasion but a life mission. I strive to be healthier, more fit and a good person every day.
I won’t give up with my yes New year’s resolution because you alwais can do it better.
I agree with Mrs. Sable. Just do it. Don’t make New Year’s Resolutions and promises you cannot keep, just do it and keep it simple – one day at a time, work very, very, HARD and don’t beat yourself up if you have not succeeded the first day – stay, the course – keep TRYING and most importantly make sure your HEART IS IN IT – stay committed, be POSITIFE, then you will succeed. Be honest, be kind, be yourself, be happy/1 2012 WILL be a GREAT YEAR!
Debbie is right! It is all about MOTIVATION! And the trigger to that might come on a Sunday morning, on a busy week day…
- you will loose weight, if you NEED to get on that wedding dress; it will not work if it is just for the sake of losing a few pounds (with some exceptions, of course!)
- you will save money in order to buy that house, or to go on that trip;
- you will improve your English (or Spanish), if this is a condition for a job you’re applying for, and so on…
Without any motivation, promises are promises, and nothing more. My advice is not to make a list of resolutions. Decide what you want out of life this year, and then, only then, you will have a specific motivating to do so!
Kisses to Debbie, I miss her!
Vivi
Try this the next time you make a resolution. Write down:
- The specific goal
- The benefits to be gained (why and how will it make your life better)
- Intermediate steps to achieveing the goal. What will you do this week? Next week? The first month? Achieving these steps will give yhou success experiences along the way that will keep you on track.
- A description of the end state the end state in terms that are motivational to you. (I will be able to…..)
Then create aids to visualization of the goal. A photoshop-altered picture of yourself weighing less, a picture of yourself crossing the finish line for that marathon race, a dummied-up paycheck or business card for that job promotion you seek, etc.
Review these daily, or at a minimum, every time you’re supposed to achieve one of the intermediate steps. The idea is to make internalize your focus on the goal. Make it a habit of thought. Habits are formed through repitition.
Debbie, wise as always. Seems too many of us are more interested in talking, commenting, blogging and tweeting about “it” – whatever “it” is – rather than doing “it”. Here’s to a 2012 full of more “doing”.
I used to have a list of new years resolutions; in multiple categories!
Now, the opposite works for me: a one or two word mantra. Just to course-correct.
Something that can be achieved, in multiple aspects of life. Such as ‘think big’, ‘work smart’, ‘choose healthy’. 2012 for me = ‘simplify’.
Debbie is right, and as she says”…sometimes we stop paying attention”. let’s make every day big, not just new years eve. As Albert Einstein said “Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.” Period, just pay attention, the rest will come.
I also agree with Mrs. Sable. I would also add that if you’re going to have a resolution, please do it anytime of the year. By proclaiming it on a particular day, like the first one of the year, is the first step towards failure. I would also make it a one or two word mantra.
Today is the first day of the rest of yoiur life…..
Whether you believe it or not…
Chances may be we are not the only ones in the galaxy
Apparently UFO’s 2012 resolution was to be present and closer to the earth’s 2012 global firework celebrations to welcome the new year, or for the orientals the \Year of the Dragon\ or the Acuarius for the occiedentals.
May this year, whatever it personally means to you, bring you lots of blessings and happiness.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWfhuoEFRgQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9bOocYezvY&feature=related
People in Costa Rica, Mexico and many other countries posted some more videos.
My mother, in Peru, also saw the orange ovni in the sky during the fireworks.
Belive ir or not, I found this quite impressive.
Slds
“Do it big or stay in bed…isn’t that your quote?” Awesomeness redefined!!!!
I like it when your loved ones remind you of your strengths,resolutions and potential to make them come true. Thank you Debbie and David for reinforcing my resolve for this year and a lifetime