Are you confident?
Not arrogant – just confident.
A confidence that makes you secure in knowing that you can take a position and stick to it; argue it through; revise, evolve or abandon it – but do so because of the same confidence in yourself.
It has always been my belief and observation that both in personal situations and business…people who have this level of confidence are also viewed as being more credible and honest.
Be clear – it takes confidence to revise, evolve or abandon a position because you are open to new thinking; have the personal assurance to understand that real credibility comes from being real and credible; and the poise to move on and learn.
Having said that, I am always amazed at the number of people who just don’t get it.
The people who mistake arrogance for confidence or maybe just don’t have the courage to abandon what they can no longer win.
But we know how to deal with them – don’t we?
Worse in my book, and more destructive in personal and business relationships, are the folks who mistake timidity with credibility. The type who caveats every statement with so many back pedals that by the time you hear what they have to say there is no reason to have any discussion at all because clearly there is nothing to defend; nothing to support; nothing to move on, over or through.
When you begin with a retreat; if you begin with no confidence what can be expected of the conversation other than more of the same – no confidence. No credibility.
“A good many young writers make the mistake of enclosing a stamped, self-addressed envelope, big enough for the manuscript to come back in. This is too much of a temptation to the editor.” Ring Lardner
And there you have it. Start your conversation with a stamped, self-addressed envelope that’s big enough to fit your thoughts – and they will be returned – often unheard, unread, unknown.
Be confident…and the world will be more confident. Be bold and help make the world more bold. Be credible and make a difference.
But give them that envelope? Be ready for the return.
What do you think?
PS – here is another form of that lack of credibility…for the fun of it…